I used my mom voice in the cereal aisle at Kroger.
Two strangers’ kids froze, and a grown man put his cart back.
2,022 jokes · 32 topics · new daily
Funny jokes worth telling.
Clean, short jokes that are actually funny: dad jokes, one-liners, work jokes and holiday jokes, sorted into lists so you find the right one fast.
Today’s jokes
What do you call a snake who works at the DMV?
A civil serpent.
I don’t need a scary costume this year.
I just hold up my grocery receipt.
My mother-in-law promised she’d stay out of it.
She said it from the middle of it.
I asked my lawyer how long the case would take.
He said, “How much money do you have?”
My wife and I found a five-course lunch we can afford on a fixed income.
Costco on sample day.
I tell everyone I practice strict catch-and-release.
I’ve perfected the release. Still working on the catch.
The district made us attend an all-day workshop on avoiding teacher burnout.
On a Saturday.
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Halloween and Thanksgiving jokes
In season now. Holiday lists move up here about six weeks before the big day.
Halloween · Today
60 Halloween Jokes
Short, clean Halloween jokes: costumes, candy, haunted houses and the office party.
Thanksgiving · Thu, Nov 26
45 Thanksgiving Jokes
Clean Thanksgiving jokes: turkey, relatives, football and the post-dinner nap.
For workAll joke lists
32 topics, best jokes first. Every joke is a quick setup and a punchline.
Holidays and birthdays
Everyday jokes
Life and family
Work and jobs
Food, pets and hobbies
Joke videos
A new short joke video every day. See all videos
I just finished writing a book on reverse psychology.Dad Jokes · 9s
I asked my phone, “Why am I still single?”One-Liners · 8s
Our HOA sent me a letter demanding I take down my creepy Halloween decorations.Halloween · 10s
Skunked again, Dale asked the guy at the fish counter to toss him four trout so he could honestly say he caught them.Fishing · 14s
My math teacher’s parrot flew out an open window and never came back.Puns · 10s
Popular joke lists
Hand-picked jokes for work, church, husbands, wives and more.
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51 Clean Jokes for WorkOffice-safe jokes for meetings, the team chat and the break room.
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33 Funny Food PunsClean food puns about cooking, cheese, fruit, veggies and coffee.
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31 Funny Knock-Knock Jokes for AdultsClean knock-knock jokes for adults about work, bills, getting older and home repairs.
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40 Funny Boss JokesJokes about bosses, managers and the meetings they schedule.
35 Funny Animal PunsClean animal puns about pets, farm animals, wild animals and bugs.
45 Dad Jokes for WorkOffice-safe dad jokes for meetings, Slack and the break room.
51 Funny Pet JokesThe best dog and cat jokes in one place, for pet lovers.
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51 Funny Jokes for SeniorsClean, relatable jokes for seniors about aging, retirement, doctors and technology.
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41 Retirement Jokes for CoworkersJokes for a coworker’s retirement card, party or farewell email.
41 Retirement Speech JokesJokes and lines that work read out loud in a retirement speech or toast.
33 Birthday Jokes for CoworkersFunny birthday jokes for a coworker’s card or the office cake.
41 Over-the-Hill Birthday JokesJokes for milestone birthdays: 40, 50, 60 and beyond.
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48 Sarcastic Jokes for WorkDry, sarcastic jokes that are still safe to share at work.
Meme of the day
Too real?
A new JokeBay meme every day, straight from our joke lists. Today’s is from One-Liners.
More one-linersJust added
A few new jokes go up every day.
Thanksgiving JokesNew today
This year I brined the turkey overnight in salt water, just like the experts say.
It got the bathtub. I showered with the garden hose.
One-LinersNew today
I finally got my full eight hours of sleep.
It took three nights, but I got there.
Funny Wife JokesNew today
My wife always knows what I’m going to say before I say it.
So far today, she’s won two arguments I haven’t even started.
Got a joke worth telling?
Send it in. If it gets a real laugh here, it goes on the list.