I asked my lawyer to explain the contract in plain English.
He said, “Sure. That’s a separate fee.”
2,016 jokes · 32 topics · new daily
Funny jokes worth telling.
Clean, short jokes that are actually funny: dad jokes, one-liners, work jokes and holiday jokes, sorted into lists so you find the right one fast.
Today’s jokes
My aunt has been 39 for so long…
Her 39th birthday just held its own 10-year reunion.
The horror movie killer never runs, yet he always catches up.
My student loans used the exact same strategy.
I told my wife I wasn’t asleep in my recliner. I was just resting my eyes.
She asked why my eyes were snoring.
In college, I paid good money for a fake ID that said I was 21.
Now I’d pay double for one that says I’m 49.
My neighbor asked, “Hot enough for you?”
No, I’m holding out for the surface of the sun.
The class parents’ group chat has 143 new messages.
One is the answer. The other 142 say “Thank you!!”
Our dentist just married a manicurist.
Now they fight tooth and nail.
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Halloween and Thanksgiving jokes
In season now. Holiday lists move up here about six weeks before the big day.
Halloween · Sat, Oct 31
60 Halloween Jokes
Short, clean Halloween jokes: costumes, candy, haunted houses and the office party.
Thanksgiving · Thu, Nov 26
43 Thanksgiving Jokes
Clean Thanksgiving jokes: turkey, relatives, football and the post-dinner nap.
For workAll joke lists
32 topics, best jokes first. Every joke is a quick setup and a punchline.
Holidays and birthdays
Everyday jokes
Life and family
Work and jobs
Food, pets and hobbies
Joke videos
A new short joke video every day. See all videos
My math teacher’s parrot flew out an open window and never came back.Puns · 10s
Our HOA sent me a letter demanding I take down my creepy Halloween decorations.Halloween · 10s
My credit card company called to flag suspicious activity on my account.One-Liners · 10s
My wife says I have absolutely no sense of direction.Dad Jokes · 9s
My wife handed me her new phone and asked me to sync it.Dad Jokes · 10s
Popular joke lists
Hand-picked jokes for work, church, husbands, wives and more.
31 Funny Knock-Knock Jokes for KidsSilly, clean knock-knock jokes for parents to tell the kids: animals, food and holidays.
51 Clean Jokes for WorkOffice-safe jokes for meetings, the team chat and the break room.
51 Funny Wife JokesAffectionate wife jokes for husbands who know who’s really in charge.
33 Funny Food PunsClean food puns about cooking, cheese, fruit, veggies and coffee.
34 Clean Jokes for ChurchWholesome, clean jokes to read at church, Bible study or the potluck.
51 Funny Husband JokesHusband jokes for wives who have heard “I know where it is” one too many times.
21 Funny Christmas PunsClean Christmas puns for cards and captions: Santa, reindeer, snowmen and elves.
31 Funny Knock-Knock Jokes for AdultsClean knock-knock jokes for adults about work, bills, getting older and home repairs.
23 Funny Halloween PunsClean Halloween puns for captions and parties: ghosts, skeletons, vampires and witches.
40 Funny Boss JokesJokes about bosses, managers and the meetings they schedule.
35 Funny Animal PunsClean animal puns about pets, farm animals, wild animals and bugs.
45 Dad Jokes for WorkOffice-safe dad jokes for meetings, Slack and the break room.
51 Funny Pet JokesThe best dog and cat jokes in one place, for pet lovers.
23 Funny Work PunsOffice-safe work puns and job puns about careers, trades and quitting.
51 Funny Jokes for SeniorsClean, relatable jokes for seniors about aging, retirement, doctors and technology.
36 Christmas Jokes for WorkOffice-safe Christmas jokes for the party, the card and the team chat.
50 Jokes for Work MeetingsQuick icebreakers to open a meeting, a Zoom call or the team chat.
41 Retirement Jokes for CoworkersJokes for a coworker’s retirement card, party or farewell email.
41 Retirement Speech JokesJokes and lines that work read out loud in a retirement speech or toast.
33 Birthday Jokes for CoworkersFunny birthday jokes for a coworker’s card or the office cake.
41 Over-the-Hill Birthday JokesJokes for milestone birthdays: 40, 50, 60 and beyond.
30 Thanksgiving Jokes for WorkOffice-safe Thanksgiving jokes for the potluck, the team chat and the meeting.
48 Sarcastic Jokes for WorkDry, sarcastic jokes that are still safe to share at work.
Meme of the day
Tag someone who does this.
A new JokeBay meme every day, straight from our joke lists. Today’s is from Clean Jokes.
More clean jokesJust added
A few new jokes go up every day.
Thanksgiving JokesNew today
At Thanksgiving, my aunt asked if I’m still seeing “that nice girl.”
We’ve been married eleven years. She was passing her the rolls.
Getting Older JokesNew today
I asked the young guy at the electronics store where they keep the CDs.
He gave me directions to the bank.
Retirement Speech JokesNew today
She’s trained eleven managers over the past thirty years.
Three of them are in this room, and they’re still a little scared of her.
Got a joke worth telling?
Send it in. If it gets a real laugh here, it goes on the list.